You Again
by Late to the Party
Summary: Charname meets an old adversary who believes Charname lacks the upper hand, resulting in a not-so-heroic moment where truths, untruths and partial truths blend together in a burst of vitriol. Nothing quite like a captive audience to monologue at. Gorion would be ashamed. Part IV of the 'Woulda-Coulda-Shoulda' Series. AU one-shot. (Warning: derogatory insinuations)


"You, again?" Chȧɍnάmę sighed loudly and paced, eyeing the green clouds that served to clad the roofless void above whatever hell he had found himself back within. "And now you want to live again? I mean really, are you that obsessed with me? You stalked me in life, you haunt me in death – go on, deny it. You sent assassins after me, I thwarted your plans, you were obsessed with godhood and I was just that meddlesome kid that kept getting in your way. Oh, you never paid me a second thought, never got your hands dirty until _after_ I faced you."

Chȧɍnάmę paused for breath. It wasn't a very long pause. "So tell me, 'brother', why did you never try to kill me in Candlekeep? You were there, I was there; you really thought I'd make a suitable scapegoat? But then you threw it all away. And now you're back. Have to hand it to you, you really don't give up, you spectral revenant you.

"Speaking of, why precisely do I need you? You really think that I won't find a way out of here, or maybe, just maybe, I could hole up here until every last one of our dear siblings is dead and then I ascend by default. I mean, old age and all. True, there's starvation and dehydration, but that's what clerics are for, am I right? You know I am. Boredom? I have you to talk to. Oh yes, brother, I can talk for a looooooooong time. We've never really had the chance to chat before, have we? This is the first time _you_ can't attack me. I wonder what would happen if I attacked you? Guess what, I have the wish spell. Yeah, because I'm a pooooooweeerful mage now. Also, you're dead. Another thing, I know the prophecies of Alaundo too, 'cause guess what? I was raised in a library, and not just any library, but the library housing Alaundo's prophecies. So tell me again: what exactly can you do for me that I can't do for myself? 'Cause I am, after all, the Terror of the Sword Coast, and I killed you twice already. Are we keeping score now? Third time's the charm?

"What's that? Gloating isn't becoming? Yeah, well neither is ambushing hapless youths and old men as they flee into the night. Ever think about that? What, me, bitter? Oh no, not at all. I only lost my home and then you _destroyed everyone I knew growing up using your doppelgängers_. Why? What was the point of that? You were going to use me as a scapegoat so why bother? Trying to kill me in the catacombs… how stupid. And were where you? Back sipping tea and making polite conversation? Or losing your godsdamned mind and going crazy and ransacking everything? You just discard people once you're done with them. So tell me again, _'brother'_, why would I ever possibly want you by my side?

"In fact, you know what? If you don't spill whatever it is you're holding out in the hopes of returning to life, I'mma gonna leave you here. Yeah. We'll be stuck here, together, and then I'm gonna tell you about Cythandria and Tamoko. Petty? You want petty? Guess how quickly their legs parted for me, 'brother'. What, you think I'm lying? That it doesn't hurt you? Maybe it doesn't, but you know what, your whores abandoned you like everyone else. You thought you were discarding others but the reality is, they abandoned you.

"This'll mean nothing to you, but I didn't want your discards; Edwin on the other hand? Licentious Edwin? Oh, come now 'brother', did you really think as Tamoko pleaded for your pathetic life, begged and begged me to try to 'save' you from the madness that consumed you, I didn't remember that night, didn't remember that she was there, and didn't tell her there was a cost. What cost? My bed, of course. Only, it wasn't me, just Edwin. Oh yes, he did some terrible things to her, the delinquent Thayvian that he is. Magic's just the beginning. As for Cythandria, well, let's just say that enchantments have been put to great abuse; just ask Imoen. In fact, don't, because if you ever see her again, it's too soon and if you ever think I'd allow you anywhere near here, you, dear brother, are very, very much mistaken. So writhe in torment, knowing that you couldn't even protect your whores. You tried to take everything from me but I most certainly took everything from you.

"Petty, yeah, I guess I am. But you know what? I think I earnt that right after everything we went through together, we can just put it down to 'brotherly love'. Siblings fight after all. Ain't that right, 'brother'?

"Yeah, that's what I thought. Now shut up and go haunt that corner over there. You'll still be there when I need you, 'cause I'm pretty sure you're bound to this place now. It is the same place as before isn't it? Same walls, same smell, same feel of stone beneath my feet. Yeah, not as stupid as you think I am. What, you think I earnt the title 'Terror of the Sword Coast' for my deeds and not on account of my dashing good looks? Surprise: you're not the only one whose a demigod. Was a demigod. Sucks to be you.

"Oh, and when you're ready to apologise instead of acting like you own me, feel free to float on by. In the meantime, I've got a lot of reading to catch up on. What else am I going to use a bag of holding for? Because yes, I did grow up in a library. There are some really riveting tales I've yet to finish. So whenever you're ready, 'brother'; after all, patience never was your strong suit, was it? Certainly not in bed. 'Burn', as Edwin would say. Now go say 'boo' to a goose."

Chȧɍnάmę spat on the floor and wandered to the other corner of the pocketplane, utterly unrepentant for his behaviour. Maybe he'd wake up from this dream too, or maybe it was real: it really didn't matter at this point. Either way, he finally got to tell Sarevok most of what he'd wanted to say for a long time. Mostly. There was always more but at least he had time.

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**A/N: I did briefly consider having Charname use turn undead/control undead, or reading aloud but I like the piece as is. Also, I, as the author of this work, do not support or condone Charname's derogatory attitude in this piece. I will leave it to you, dear reader, to decide whether or not Charname is telling the truth or fibbing in an attempt to rile Sarevok.**


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